nothin good comes out of my mouth this few days.. well, talk abt bloggin being gay.. hahaha.. its really been a while since i last updated my blog..
sch.. the biggest pain in the butt.. u're practically stress over wad ur teacher would say abt the progress of ur project.. sometimes i jus wonder, do ppl work better under pressure of actually produce better quality work without pressure.. wad kind of worker are you?
my life.. been rather filled with alot of attention i need actually and now i'm having troubles coping with every single one of them.. wad can i say.. i asked for it.. i chose this path of tryin to please everyone and at the same time i chose a path of desperation to find someone who would love me.. and with this action i took i'm practically damagin my own image.. sometimes i'm not even sure wad i'm doing.. confused and at the same time convincing myself that "yes i took the right path!" wad self deceiving acts!! arggghh!!! star star star!
sometimes i dun even knw myself with the actions i take.. and wad's worst is after doing them.. i would question myself if i jus made that move.. and i hav no idea wad is goin on with me.. something is really wrong.. really really wrong..
sleep.. i can nvr hav enough sleep.. i'm craving for sleep everyday and because of that it leads to even later days in sch.. goin late for lessons.. i'm getting lazier... must b because of late night suppers..
hate.. i hate myself.. my self discipline in the actions i take.. and wad goes on in my mind.. i'm weak! i'm weak against my ownself.. i lost d battle to myself..
disappointments are pilling up one after another everyday.. it worries me.. i'm now at a place of no turning back.. i hav gt to move on.. jus hope the choice i made is the right one..
the media has been taking in projects sucessfully.. so the company is doing fine actually.. we're getting stepping stones of success and at the same time we're getting our heads stepped on for trying to reach the the goal of success.. we'll hang in there.. with the buddies that made this possible i think we'll pull through jus fine.. =)
dreams of money flying out of the window.. haix... that was one hella night mare.. dun wanna talk abt it.. jus thinkin abt it fills me up with regrets of nt pickin up the hse phone and also reminds me of wad being lazy can do to u.. haiz..!! money!!!
the electrical buddies..! they've gone K.O. on me one after another.. first the laptop.. can't charge itself, and the laptop can't seem to detect the electrical source input.. and because of that.. the battery went dead and can't charge due to the undetectable electrical source.. darn.. my headphones.. went dead on me on the left side.. was walkin and suddenly the left side of the headphone died.. AhHHhHHhH!!! its like a single side pleasure!! not shiok!! psp.. my wife.. battery is causing me problems.. after playin a while it jus dies on u.. and i've gt to attach the spare batt and after attachin the battery it looks like some OLD ANTIQUE psp la.. haiz.. my handphone.. sometimes i'm unable to receive phone calls and msgs after sometime.. and i hav no idea if its my line or my phone itself.. =( this is killin me.. and money is the only source of rescuing me.. anybody wanna sponsor me? i'll be ur best fren? hahaha..
i think thats abt all.. the rest is abt the same except my love life.. jus hope my love life will turn out well.. *fingers cross*
[ The past is only the future with the lights on... ]
m.C.